The Emotions of Stimulating Desire – Michaël Devilliers
03.05.2023
Excerpt from the collective book “Envier ou avoir envie”
“Envy is only a fear of seeing beauty that one could not achieve oneself.” – Jules Renard
Desire Born from Envy
Envy emerges when we compare ourselves to someone else valued for their achievements or possessions. This awareness generates a sense of lack and drives us, in imagination, to appropriate their success. The envied person is seen not as they are, but as an image of what we wish to attain.
Envy can therefore act as motivation, a way to define goals: the envier represents the present state, the envied the desired state. If approached proactively, envy can guide reflection on needed resources and steps to achieve the goal.
Visualization: Envy naturally prompts imagining oneself in the envied person’s position. Like athletes visualizing success before performance, this activates mirror neurons, enhancing learning and personal evolution.
Independence from social desirability: Envy can arise before conscious judgments about what should be desired, revealing previously unnoticed aspirations.
Emotions That Shape Envy
Envy is ambivalent, blending positive and negative emotions: fear, anger, sadness. Understanding and integrating these emotions allows envy to become a source of desire and motivation.
1. Fear and the Call to Adventure
Drawing on Joseph Campbell’s monomyth, the hero’s journey begins with hesitation—a natural fear that accompanies desire for adventure. Fear anticipates danger and keeps us vigilant. Overcoming fear transforms it into excitement: the same physical signals, but paired with envie to act and explore.
2. Anger and Dissident Desires
Anger energizes and signals misalignment with our values. When coupled with envy, it highlights both attraction to the envied and frustration at the perceived gap. Recognizing these emotions prevents them from turning into destructive behaviors. Example: Scottish soldiers in Iraq developed post-traumatic stress because suppressed anger, not fear, caused internal conflict. Creating spaces for emotional expression resolved the symptoms.
3. Sadness, Loss, and Envy
Sadness accompanies situations beyond our control, allowing reflection and adaptation. In envy, it can signal perceived limitations, e.g., envying youth or creative success. Distinguishing between actual lack and limiting beliefs prevents false grief from stifling action. The myth of Daedalus illustrates how jealousy can escalate when perceived abundance is ignored.
Harnessing Emotional Diversity
Connecting with envy requires navigating a spectrum of emotional experiences—successes, failures, and challenges. Individuals aware of their emotional landscape, both positive and negative, can maintain motivation and resilience.
For teams, leaders and managers must cultivate emotional intelligence, modeling awareness and guiding collective resilience, turning envy into a constructive force for growth and achievement.
References:
J. Campbell, Le Héros aux mille et un visages (1949)
R. Dilts & S. Gilligan, Le Voyage du héros, 2nd ed., 2019
P. Philippot, Émotion et psychothérapie, 2007